Kwasi Sakabo – Turkson – the Son of a Turkey

It was Saturday morning and as usual, I trekked to one of the most patronized African stores looking for a flyer that announces an evening event. I had three flyers -all free events – to choose from. I quickly dismissed the first one. Itwas an imported funeral. Someone was organizing a funeral for the niece of his mother-in-law’s friend’s sister,who’d died about five years earlier back home. The relationship between the host and dead person was not in anyway consanguineous. This manner of“fundraising” is not for Sakabo; not inmy present predicament as a guest of the Ministry of Housing, Section 8Home Division. Besides, I did not think there’d be much by way of booze. The second flyer was an all day naming ceremony in someone’s home. I detest private home events because for one thing, you cannot enjoy yourself with-out the preying eyes trailing or tailing you. Plus, you cannot eat, drink, dance and leave without making a donation. The third flyer was God-sent. It announced the outdooring of twins in a spacious downtown hotel – free. I uttered “thank you” to Akuamoah, Nyame my ancestral family God. I went to the place late in the evening and was not disappointed. Because it was an event for twins, everything was doubled –food, drinks, and even the birds. “This is my turf” I said in a manly resolution as I sneaked to take what seemed like the last available seat. I realized that the five others on my table were all birds – young and beautiful ones.“Good evening ladies” I greeted. The response wasn’t all that great, but I didn’t go there to greet and be greeted. I went there to get away from that witch landlady of mine and to have a good time. “Any of you care for a drink” I asked. The one sitting close by asked for an orange juice while the rest said nothing. I came with three shots on the rocks and an unopened can of orange juice without a cup. Suddenly, the place was enlivened with a popular song and the birds flew on to the dance floor, except the one sitting close by who’d asked for a drink. I took a cursory look at her and told her I liked her flowing dress. She smiled and thanked me and cutely reminded me that I forgot to add a cup to the orange juice. “Awura,” I started “I didn’t for-get.” In places such as this, never drink from a cup that’s filled in your absence,and especially from someone you barely know. Now I can go get you a cup so it’s poured in your presence. She was genuinely surprised with the honesty and insight. No, no, no, she protested. I’ll drink from the can.“Smart one” I praised her. What do you do? She wanted to now. Since you started the preamble, why don’t you go ahead and tell me what you do, I urged her. “I am a practicing attorney”And your name? I probed. She pulled a business card and handed it to me. Hmmm I sighed. “What?” she asked.Nothing, Leticia Lorna Turkson Esquire, I pronounced. I thought you were an African Ms. Turkson or is it Mrs. Turkson? Of course I am an African be-cause I am a Ghanaian and it’s Ms. Turkson, but you can call me Leticia.Now you tell me Mister, what do you do? “Nothing” I reply. She seemed hurt but didn’t want to show it. “And your name?” Kwasi Sakabo, I replied again.“Why do you want to insult me” she sadly opined. I put it to you that I don’t lie to women, your Honor. And I am also unmarried, I added before she could ask. This is all the truth, nothing but the truth about Kwasi Sakabo from the holy village of Addo Nkwanta. For heaven’s sake can you stop these legal semantics, she pleaded. Is it really truly  your name is what you told me? I swear by Akuamoah Nyame! Stop it!!!She screamed above the blasting music,I don’t like those things to be invoked in my presence. Do you believe me then? Yes, I do, I promised.You said you are not working, why? Nkrataa! I said as a matter of fact. Can I come see you in your Chambers for help then? “Which Chambers, home or office?” she teased. “Both” would be nice, I said encouragingly. “You seem so intelligent and good mannered. I wouldn’t mind about your current status because there could be a way out,but your name. “What’s wrong with my name?It’s too kokooase nkurasefuo din. Where are you from? She wanted to know. I told her but I sensed she was disappointed. The way you pronounce“r” gave you away but … Where didyou think I came from, I cut her off be-fore she could finish. Let’s leave it as is because I don’t wantto get into the dirty politics of Ghana. Listen up, baby. At least, Kwasi Sakabo is a name with identity more than the stolen identity of Leticia Lorna Turk-son? What does Leticia or Lorna mean?Maybe Turkson means the son of a turkey. Akuamoah Nyame, so you are Krokroba!!! Or you’re from Turkey!She didn’t know whether to laugh or cry. How about if you were to become Mrs. Sakabo? It could happen, but my friends would make fun and laugh at me, she volunteered. “For being married?” No, it’s the name thing. Can’t you anglicize it to Qwazi Sacks or something like that? “Like what? I asked but she couldn’t explain. “Woman” I started “Kwasi Sakabo is a sacred name given to me in a religious ceremony. It has cultural and spiritual meaning and you want me to shorten it to Qwazi a name of Arabic heritage and Sacks, a European identity. Is that what they teach in Law School?” I asked. I would suggest you bleach your skin to fit your name. I am yet to see a European called Kwasi Sakabo. You know why? I put it to her again. “No, why?”she asked. “Because they are not out of their minds. “School without education is dangerous.” I pointed out to her.“But I have my Law degree” she defended. That’s exactly the point I am trying to make. School degrees have nothing to do with education. Structured classroom lectures cannot educate the mind because it is not a deep thought provoking system. Otherwise why wouldn’t you understand that your prime identity has to reflect your sociocultural and religious environment?“You have a point there” she conceded.Which day were you born? “Tuesday”she told me. Your name therefore should have been Abena Krokroba, a name no white person can claim or even ape! Now all what we need to do is perform the naming rites. And that can be done between the two of us in your Chambers!Happy Holidays, Krokroba Abena!!

Sakabo is an adults’ only series that must be read in its entirety for proper understanding.